Feature Editor
My very first suggestion is don’t DO anything, at least not right this second.
I know that it’s cliche (and even a bit insulting) to be reminded that you may not be thinking at your absolute clearest, but there it is.
Your emotions are being heavily influenced by vastly changing hormone levels, pregnancy fatigue, and stress over the changes happening in your life right now.
You are in the middle of an immense undertaking, you are bringing a new human being into the world. The new relationship with your baby may temporarily be so big that you can’t even worry about other relationships.
Now might not be the time to make any huge decisions about any other relationships.
(Especially decisions that may have lasting and far reaching consequences.)
Instead, I suggest that you take a step back and really look at the situation.
- Did you feel this way about your partner before you got pregnant?
- Are worries about finances, you health, employment or other non-relationship issues causing stress?
- Is your partner acting differently or are you fighting more now than before you became pregnant?
- Are you having a particularly physically taxing pregnancy?
- Are you feeling less “into” relationships with your friends and family too?
The answers to these questions can give you insight into whether these feelings are temporary road bumps or if there is a true, permanent problem.
Whether the problem is permanent or temporary, however, doesn’t change how you are feeling right now. You and your baby both deserve you at your emotional best when the big day comes.
The first step in that direction may be to discuss your feelings with your doctor.
Tell her how you are feeling, especially if you are losing interest in things other than your partner, as this might indicate prenatal depression. This condition, also known as antenatal depression, affects up to one-fifth of all pregnant women.
You may also want to consider seeing either a personal therapist or even attending couples therapy.
It is not uncommon for pregnancy to cause relationship problems, and either type of therapist should be well-versed in helping you and your partner through this.
If you and your partner are involved in a church, the clergy there may be able to point you towards a faith-based marriage counselor as well.
Lastly, if you decide that ending the relationship with your partner is best, please remember that although you and he may not be together any more, he is still the father of your unborn child.
That relationship should not be affected by your relationship status with him.
